• Attraction,  blog,  Essay,  Men

    Being "Nice" Doesn’t Get You Sex

    Here’s a secret that Nice Guys don’t seem to understand.  If you read this and you are thinking this is the most obvious post on the planet then you might be either a bad boy or a good guy.  But there are guys who will read this and think, “well yes that makes sense but…”  If there is a “but” at the end of your thought, this post is for you. Being “nice” doesn’t get you sex.  Doing the dishes, buying flowers, taking a woman to dinner, complimenting her dress, buying her jewelry and getting married are also things that do not get you sex. Being “lucky” doesn’t get you…

  • Attraction,  blog,  Dating Advice,  Men

    It’s Not You, It’s Him

    There are a lot of things to consider when you are dating and seeking a partner.  Most articles eagerly point out the obvious like “do you like him,” “are your lifestyles and values compatible?” One question women often overlook that lands them in miserable, unsatisfying relationships is probably more important than any of the others. Does he like women? I’m not talking about his sexual orientation.  I am talking about heterosexual, sexually active, professional, everyday men who just don’t “like” women. They want to have sex with women. But that’s not the same as “liking” women.  You’ve got to wonder (and verify with behavior) if he actually “likes” women. I…

  • Attraction,  blog,  Dating Advice,  Love is Blind Book,  Men

    Rejecting the Nice Guy

    It’s no secret I’m no fan of “nice guys.”  I’m not talking about “good” people here. I love good people. In fact, I’m glad– for the sake of common decency and societal calm–that nice guys are nice and polite as a course of their day because grumpy, negative Nelly’s are worse, but as far as dating goes, I’m not going to date a “nice guy.” Nope. Not going to happen. I find “Nice Guys” to be artificial, entitled, self-absorbed and dull. A nice guy spends so much time trying to be who he thinks you want him to be, that he has no idea what he wants or needs. Nice guys…

  • Attraction,  blog,  Dating Advice,  Love is Blind Book,  Men,  Women

    Don’t get caught in the Bangzone

    There’s a saying that says the only thing worse than being single is wishing you were.  And I would have to agree that it’s terrible to be in a bad relationship that you know you need to end.  I disagree that it’s horrible to be single.  Being single can be a lot of fun and very rewarding.  But there’s another relationship space, a sort of holding pen, that is worse than being single and just as bad as being in a bad relationship.  It’s called the bangzone. The bangzone is for women the equivalent of the friendzone for men. It is when you are given access to a guy you…